Why I love my postpartum body--and you should too.

In my experience as a mom, there's a lot of judging that goes on. We're all guilty at some point or another of looking at another mom and shaming the way she does things because we see a different and or perceived better way. I've grown to accept that as sad as it is, that's life.

But there's this whole world of body shaming that exists outside of motherhood. We spend 9 months of our pregnancies being told what a miracle it was that our bodies could grow and accommodate another human--we're basically hailed as saints for giving up so much of ourselves for someone else. And truly, we start to believe it. We take pride in every ultrasound, kick and mention of the life growing inside of us.

Then we give birth. Suddenly and abruptly we're told by loved ones, companies, and strangers that it's time to buck up and lose the "baby weight." Everyone starts suggesting diets, pills, exercise routines, cremes and wraps that can make us "like new" and "back to normal" again. And, we start to believe it. 

We're made to believe that there is something wrong with our postpartum bodies--something that needs to be erased as soon as humanly possible. It's like society says "body, you've done this wonderful thing..but it's time to go." 

I'm sorry, but I refuse this notion. I got lucky. I only gained about 15 pounds during my pregnancy (despite a monstrous appetite) and because I breastfeed I lost it quickly. Because of this women scoff at me and say I don't understand what it's like to struggle with postpartum self image as it is forced upon us. What people forget that our bodies are different. My "let myself go" may be different than yours but can't we both share that experience? 

I didn't have trouble losing the weight I gained while pregnant--this time. I remember looking at myself hours after giving birth and comparing what I saw for the last nine months I thought "wow, I look great!" Then I got home. I saw how my tummy sagged like jello, how visible and red the stretchmarks that hid from my sight for the last few months were...and I felt awful about myself. It didn't get easier when people started forcing the idea on me that I needed to change as soon as the doctor gave me the green light. 

I love my postpartum body. Not because I lost the weight, or because I'm not as saggy and my stretchmarks have faded slightly. I love my postpartum body because I can look at myself and see something amazing that my body and I did together. We went through so much and we're blessed with a beautiful baby..why should I be ashamed of that? I love my stretchmarks because they help me remember how it felt when Thatcher would hiccup inside of me or how happy I was to look down and know he was in there growing. 

People keep telling me how when I wean my boobs will be "saggy" or "gross" like I should be ashamed. But like my body we experienced something wonderful together. They provided milk for my baby. Comfort for him and I couldn't imagine being disappointed in any part of my body that has helped bring me so much joy in being able to bear and feed my sweet boy.  

I think it's great to want to be healthy and work out and diet after having a baby or weaning a child. . But I'm tired of being asked to believe that it's necessary or right for everyone. 

My body brought me my baby and I'm proud of what we've been through. I hope every mom can let themselves feel love for their postpartum body instead of shame.