I recently reconnected with an old friend. After catching up a bit and talking about life he asked if I was super successful like he'd thought I'd be when we were younger. After hearing that I quit college to stay at home with my kids he said, "so wait.. you're just a mom?" I have to admit, it stung. Even though it's not the first time that someone who isn't caught up with my current life has made a comment indicating that I have "given up" what could have been a great career or "let myself quit" school, which I was actually pretty good at, it still hurt.
I am not "just a mom." I have not "given up" anything. In fact, the way I see it I've gained a great deal more.
"Just a mom" seriously implies that what I'm doing isn't enough, important or valued. "Just a mom" means that I've somehow lowered my standards or my ambition and settled for something not as worthy. In reality, isn't being "just a mom" more than that? I'm not just cleaning up spills and building block towers. I'm not just kissing knees and washing diapers. I'm choosing to put aside most of my previous identity, my time, my sleep, and every bit of me to raise another human who will (hopefully) become a productive and moral adult.
And in my eyes, I haven't "given up" all that much in the process.
I've gained more patience, more love, and more of an understanding of sacrifice than I could have ever imagined. I've learned so many things outside the realm of academic knowledge and I've been given the gift of time with my babies.
School is wonderful. It's great--but it isn't for everyone. I'm extremely proud to be a mother. I'm happier not having my degree than I can even explain- and in the process I've found things I'm truly truly passionate about.
My life is more than "just a mom."
